我想说其实你很好 你自己却不知道
真心的对我好 不要求回报
爱一个人 希望他过更好
打从心里暖暖的 你比自己更重要
Sunday, October 29, 2006
真心的对我好 不要求回报
爱一个人 希望他过更好
打从心里暖暖的 你比自己更重要
these are my PerfectFriends and i love them. :)
the leader of PerfectFriends - PerfectChar
as i spent more time with them, i realised... they arent that Perfect aft all...
:( i have no more PerfectFriends.
met up with lovely xuan ytd night at abt 10. intention was to pass her the choc eclairs and she loves it. i ate one jus now and the puff really sux. next time i will pass u fresh ones k. paiseh.
we hanged arnd at mac talking abt stuff, and drinking milo/green tea. watched "death note" aft that and we both love it. the sequel is showing tentatively on 28th dec. still a long way to go hor... i cant wait to watch it. so nice.
reached home at 3 plus. slept from 4am - 1pm. and there was no breakfast lor. had to eat honeystars and bread and eclairs. shldnt be eating all these cus my throat hurts. hope i will be sick on tue or wed...
Saturday, October 28, 2006
i jus remembered sth. i had a dream.
i dreamt that meixuan told me she was at xuehui's cousin shop on xuehui's bday and she and the guys all celebrated her bday without me knowing abt it until today. and that xuehui jus smsed me to say she's meeting the guys tmr.
helo pple. i jus woke up! napped from 4-7. this morn came home at only 8.30 and my mum made me wake up to eat my meepok and flossbread at 1. :(
my throat has been hurting for qt a few days. ive been munching on hari raya goodies and also eclairs! haha we ordered one whole carton of eclairs and it contains 14 boxes, 12 pc each box. costs abt $33.80. so cheap hor. :)
went aidah's hse ytd. the attendance was disappointing but i had fun eating. i ate till i felt so slpy. the biscuit pizza zarina made was really v unique.
she soaked the cream crackers in milk and placed all on a tray. she added cheese on the biscuits and put chicken, onions and duno wat else and covered with another layer of cheese again. actually its 2 layers on top and 2 layers below. finally she baked them. v v nice.
went hansen's hse aft that to play mj. a v nice mr lim sent us from sengkang to bukit batok and nv take a single cent from us. so nice lor. we had booked a ssangyong cab from workplace woodlands to sengkang and that david (driver) had charged us 8 bucks adv booking and in all it was 25bucks! so exp. :( i spent a lot man. eclairs... cab... mac for breakfast this morn.
yea. i ate super a lot at aidah's hse then went hansen's hse for butter cookies and oreo choc wafer. but its not nice leh. finally hotcakes before i left for home.
vincent had told me a lot abt myself and i will keep those things in mind and really try and change. i wan to be successful in life. i wan my colleagues not to dislike me at all. this is only my first job and i hope the future ones, i will be more mature when handling stuff and politics.
thur was dinner at siam kitchen with neo wen and char. really appreciate the fact that u all brought ur passports down to WOODLANDS (not msia!)... haha. thx girls. i have thought thru abt wat u all said... i duno...
wed was dinner at j8 sakae with wh. he was v v v quiet the whole night. i tink im in deep shit. but theres nth i can do. my friends will jus scold me for kicking up a big fuss and saying nonsensical stuff. hai. i wish i didnt. but nvm la. pple all come and go.
was v upset when francis tendered last mon and hes leaving on fri! which means on fri, hansen wh and francis are leaving. how sad right. but now im feeling ok la. jus that i wish francis can stay on. he is my listening ear, my francis papa, my fav lunchmate, my fav colleague and he loves peanut butter as much as i do. he was on mc ytd and cldnt go aidah's hse. i hope ur feeling better. :)
maybe its true, im jus a lonely girl looking for sth to hold on to.
my tummy is damn huge tonight.
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
the ceiling was low. the fans were useless. it was warm. it was crowded.
6 friends were sitting arnd a smaller-than-normal mahjong table, drinking home-made lipton peach tea, playing mahjong, talking abt crap and teasing a fat girl.
they took turns to play to keep everyone entertained as 2 of them were falling aslp. in the backgrnd, music was playing from the heated-up sony ericsson phone. the fat girl (owner of the phone) who was sitting beside the phone constantly shuffled the music to make sure each playing song pleased the ear drums of her friends. the shuffling of the tiles was louder than the music but she was still singing away.
she may be fat, and she may look bored/tired, but she was happy. happy being with friends she loves. it was jus a simple gathering, but she was contented. she knew all of them will be her friends forever, and she knew nobody regretted going to the house.
she laughed at every single joke her friends made abt her. she liked it. she likes her friends to make fun of her. and she knows, the day they dont, is the day they arent her friends anymore.
that night, as usual, her friends listened to all her stories. one complaint she repeated 6 times. but he let her cont. they all know she loves telling stories. and she appreciates them a lot. she knows they care. and she hopes this simple communication btwn them can last forever.
sometimes, she feels she is doing too much of the talking and she wishes to know more abt her friends. but her friends will always be interrupted. and they know, she is jus like that.
a few hrs passed by, the leather sofa she was sitting on made her feel v uncomfortable and warm. she grumbled and she asked for more drinks and some food. was offered a yam thingie from taiwan, and she ate it, with more grumblings following aft cus it made her feel bloated.
in contrast, her gd fren liked it. and she gobbled down 2. she looked pleased and appreciated their friend's offer.
it seems like the fat girl will nv appreciate pple, will she?
but she does.
she appreciates her gd fren (skinny girl) cutting the mac hotcakes for her. it was nicely-cut, coated with maple syrup, before it was served into the fat girl's mouth.
she appreciates her gd fren (fat boy) sending his friends (fat girl/skinny girl/skinny boys) home everytime aft a late night out.
she appreciates her gd fren (another skinny boy) letting them stay over and play mahjong everytime.
she does.
-
its nice seeing everyone making an effort to meet up despite being tired.
its nice seeing everyone making an effort to keep in contact though each is leading a diff life.
its nice seeing everyone. :) really.
-
sorry for so many entries today. i napped for 4hrs and only woke up at 9. i doubt i will be slping early tonight. patrick had ordered pizza and i ate the whole garlic bread, accompanied with more arnotts chocs. and im lovin' it. throat better not hurt tmr. though i feel like getting mc. :(
weihao jus said i spend money like water and i eat like buffet everyday...
not only this dear, i take cab max 4 times a wk and min 3 times a wk to work. ahah. i even got a cab driver's hp no. so that i can call him every morn if i need a cab! he said he will give me discount leh!!
i rem once, the blocks that i pass by everyday on my way to the bus stop, were white-washed. and the next time i took a bus, the buildings were alrd brightly-colored. imagine the no. of days in btwn i took a cab? my god. but im lazy la. and its really a habit la... sigh.
feeling out of sorts cus its all not sorted out and sth seems missing.
i wish u arent in love.
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
im feeling so slpy. but i woke up at 2 leh. am considering of taking a short nap though. :)
having a little bit of sorethroat. ate too much of the arnotts chocs. yummy.
i actually have gained almost 7kg since apr. sigh. saddening.
-
life has been tiring... its gona be a v quick entry below...
was on leave on fri. wanted to go vivocity with vincent but was slacking arnd and chatting on msn till it rained suddenly so decided to go another time. met up with my lovely colleagues for dinner at "taste of thailand" then cont snacking at satay club. followed by billiard and snooker at amk. then s11 then home and slept at 5.30.
from that moment onwards, everything changed. =x details are to be told only verbally... but anws. most of my friends alrd know. except a few. i have alrd told wy teck kun xuan angela meifong francis vincent kent gw neo. hahaha.
-
sat was shopping. bought a skirt. 50bucks. cldnt concentrate on looking at stuff cus was on the phone with vincent thruout. dinnered at din tai fung with xuan kun teck and kent. so nice to see everyone. :) went coffee bean before heading to ps for movie. but no seats. spore is getting too crowded huh. there is no space for me! :( hanged arnd at mac before we went home. love kent.
-
sun was service at new creation with vincent and meifong. almost dozed off. it was worse than lecture. i hope i can survive in sch next yr.
shopped arnd at suntec. bought a bag for 70 and a pair of pants for 60. i have spent almost 200 last wkend la. wanted more shopping so we went vivocity. however... no shopping cus nth to shop. no movie cus no movie to watch. and it was so super crowded. i hate crowds la. spoil my mood. saw kent and lala and was happy. haha.
dinner was at not-so-crowded habourfront. dessert was at coffeeclub. home and then on the phone with vincent again then slept. v v tired. i have been chatting with vincent almost everyday for more than an hr each time. my bills! but i cant help it. i love gossiping.
-
its work again on mon.
it was kinda slack. for the first time, everyone left before 6.30. went gym and then met up with gw kent lala for prata at casuarina. went back kent's hse. xuan and teck and wy joined not long aft... played mahjong. i wana play more mahjong leh. :(
went tpy for mac breakfast and reached home at 5 plus. i haven been home on fri nights. it has been like this for mths. this is getting habitual.
Saturday, October 21, 2006
im missing "troubled bestie" a lot now... i feel like crying... :(
i haven cried for such a long time that tears which used to flow v easily dont flow out anymore.
life has been stained. hai. too much to blog that i dont feel like blogging at all...
i wish i cld care... but i cant...
Monday, October 16, 2006
im the one making myself sad all the time. i jus ate rice. and this is making me sad. sigh. i duno wat else i can do make myself smile more.
everything thats happening to me right now might bring smiles to others but not for me. every single thing which humans find happy will not make me happy. i dont know why. i jus think negatively. how i wish things didnt hafta happen.
im feeling so full. :(
maybe i shld meet pple who dont care. at least i dont hafta care if they care or not. i dont hafta be sad when they dont care sometimes, and be sad when i know one day these pple might stop caring. if u haf nv cared before, i wldnt be sad one day.
makes sense to me totally. but i guess u guys tink im crazy.
hansen msned me abt photos and then he said i sounded sad online. i jus didnt feel like talking much i guess. so i told him i was feeling moody. and he immediately called me.
v swt person. we dont really click but that day, justin was joking that it was my bday and he went to buy a box of merci for me! i was really really surprised. and it made me laugh so hard. haha.
all i need is a little sth from u. and yet, i cldnt even haf that little sth.
and all i need right now is... i dont know...
smiling seems so tough for me.
was munching on honeystars and digestives and oily oily fat meat the whole aftnn but they dont seem to make me happy. for one period of time, food really cld make me smile with glee. but not anymore... why... sigh.
Sunday, October 15, 2006
haven been feeling like talking much nowadays. ive got sorethroat too.
:( theres sth on tmr but... hmm... sigh.
decided to stay home ytd cus i was not in the mood for gg out. had to tutor my bro and make sure he does his work too. in the end, i went out and he played games the whole day. v v naughty. but im also v naughty. my room is only a lil neater than pig sty. :(
was a v last min decision to go out with the girls - neo kangs wen and char. char is so perfect that i really cant stand it anymore. i wish i cld kill her. haha. we ate ajisen and i finally bought my ruffles. ate at clarke quay. felt so rich in wen's lexus when we drove past all the clubbers gg mos. hahaha.
weather is kinda warm today. mks me feel so lazy. ive been waking up kinda late these two days. almost 1. i usually wake up before 11 on wkends...
mum bought the new honey stars (strawberry and milk). im not a v strawberry person but nth much to munch at home cus i haven been supermarketing. so i ate it for breakfast. :(
hai so sian. i got nth to do. i shld go shopping. i wana buy a pair of birks actually. but i scared i might get blisters. i haf spent almost 700 ever since my pay day (23rd sept). shit. stop.
im so bored... :((( i shld count the no. of :( in this entry. hai bored. :(
Saturday, October 14, 2006
there was no mj cus everyone jus chatted non-stop. i duno. it was a nice gathering. with much silence from wh. poor hansen was so shagged. i shall show u guys photos of hansen aka drug addict-lookalike.
dinner was nasi lemak. francis came to the office and drove us to chongpang. so nice. haha. and i love the chili. but wasnt feeling v hungry ytd. mus be the ruffles vincent bought. its vincent's last day. im gona miss him. hai. have been munching on lovely lovely ruffles for conseqeutively 3 days. i love ruffles. i even had craving last night. haha.
aft dinner, we took an aircon-less bus to justin's hse. the aircon broke down. v v warm. palms were sweating. anws. justin had prepared kebabs for us. nice. i ate a lot a lot of marshmellows and i love them. bbqing them takes time so i jus ate them "raw". haha. drank shots with justin and red wine. and aft like 4 shots and 4-5 glasses, he totally gone. mf drank 4 glasses of red wine i tink plus 1 shot and she vomitted the whole night. so sad to see pple getting drunk. i was surprisingly sober. hmm... sad pple tend to get drunk more easily? 7 of us finished 3 bottles of red wine and me and justin drank 1/4 of the red ruby vodka. isit red ruby? it is grapefruit-flavoured. smells v nice. the aft-taste is nice too... :)
but still, i see no pt in drinking or smoking. pls dont k. hai.
took cab to work ytd and took cab home this morn. how lovely. i told myself not to yet i took twice in a day. is this shit or shit?
was kinda pissed with work ytd evening. hai. im glad u were there to help. thx.
ate dou sha bing again plus not nice mee pok. :(
i wana stay at home today. cus i got stuff to do. loads. sigh.
Thursday, October 12, 2006
o1. Pick your birth month.
o2. Strike out anything that doesn't apply to you.
o3. Bold the five-ten that best apply to you.
o4. Copy to your own journal, with all twelve months under a lj-cut.
JUNE:
i dont post in my lj anymore. other than the ones striked out, i think all the rest describe me. june babies are bad babies. so many bad pts. haha.
i have been playing too much. leaving too early aft work. feeling tired during work. all bcus of... i duno. i only know tmr i hafta clear all my shit if not latest latest by mon. mon die die hafta do ot le. all my pending agreements and appeals. im in deep shit. sigh. but no motivation to do my work. been feeling v tired lately. did i take cab twice this wk? i know this morn i took it. my stupid excuse is that i ate nasi lemak. wh gave me a short lecture and he was kinda serious abt it. ok. i will try not to take cab anymore. i promise.
pat` 我被自己困在自己设下的圈套 傻到了无可救药 says:
hai everyday everyday ot de la
pat` 我被自己困在自己设下的圈套 傻到了无可救药 says:
so tired
Weihao` wunala dreaming says:
so much work? not stress meh
Weihao` wunala dreaming says:
u look like ur quite happy with ur work
its good im happy. :)
wh != weihao
haha. this is IT lingo. and sorry. i was chatting on the phone thats why i cldnt reply u dear weihao. i know ive pangsehed u for almost a mth alrd. sorry. soon ok? :)
i wana lose weight. i wana be pretty asap. i duno. hmm...
summary for the wk:
mon - sakae
tue - pasta mania and u me & dupree (owen wilson is a v gd actor. hes so dupree.)
wed - home with lovely dou sha bing
thurs - mos burger with lovely mayo
fri - chongpang nasi lemak and mj session (to be cont...)
tmr will be kinda sian i guess.
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
2 julie wheat crackers plus 2 cups milo plus dumplings noodle plus sushi plus buds ice cream plus soft shell crab plus prata plus sugar plus curry.
my tummy says nites pple.
Sunday, October 08, 2006
i jus came back from the wedding dinner! tired...
have uploaded some pics of my family. =D i love them cus they are all so cute. hahaha. they are the ones who will nv leave me or ignore me though they are the ones who see me the least.
the cutest in the family. ME! hahah thats a joke. hey its rare im in a gd mood k.
philip my boy. =) wearing his bro's jkt.
my dad and him again. i told them to smile and look at wat they are doing. retarded la. haha.
patrick doesnt like to take photos so i secretly snapped his side view. =p
hahaha my cute mum and me. shes the greatest cus she gives in to me all the time and shes my mum. i can write a book abt her.
its time for bed aft chatting on msn. i hope i wont be taking cab again cus i need to save v badly. :(
patrick jus said my face is v swollen. he said i look like i got mumps. u guys know whats mumps? shit. this is horrible. mumps = pig-faced. hai go check out the internet for more info on mumps ok. pig-faced with one eye big one eye small. perfect! :(
to make things better, he also added that my hair doesnt suit me. the thin sides make me look bigger-faced and the fringe totally doesnt suit me at all. he said its more for jap girls. for your info, my bro seldom passes criticism abt me. bcus deep down, he tinks im prettier than some pple whom i tink are pretty. hahaha. the last few haircuts, he had praised them. nevertheless, i still love him but i jus chased him out of the hse. HOW DARE HE INSULT ME.
i finally ate the durian mooncake and jackfruit mooncake. accompanied with chicken rice and old chang kee curry puff. sounds weird right. but i was jus eating for the sake of eating. doesnt matter wat goes into my mouth.
my face is really fat. damn. i hate my fat face! its so round. its not a pancake anymore. its more like... ang ku kueh. hai i duno la. cus the photos in my phone suck. they dont suck. but i do. god.
so anws. i only slept for 3hrs! jus finished my shows and food. my stomach is too full for the goodwood park mooncake. bro is pissed. haha cus i made him buy and yet i didnt eat. but im bloated currently. ate beehoon and 2 chicken wings and petite brunch and hum chim peng and pear.
ytd morn i ate wanton mee, 2 dou sha bing, a small pc of mooncake and cheng teng. lunch was raisin bread from breadtalk. dinner was steamboat plus just's mooncake. qt nice leh. his mum made it. supper was kbox tidbits. and breakfast this morn was prata.
the weather is so hot right now. im burning.
hai i spent 100bucks ytd. hair cut plus shampoo was 55. kbox was 25. a shirt cost 30. shit. this is more than hundred. took cab like duno how many times ytd. this is shit leh.
heres more shit... photos from ytd.
me before haircut. preparing to go out. its my first self-portrait in my new phone. cus ever since i gained weight, i hate taking photos of myself. :( on a happier note, my complexion looks better here hor. haha.
super "high" plus "shagged" justin. at prata stall.
asking him to smile. haha.
hahaha damian is so cute. stole this from justin's phone. =x
thats wh. its blur but i like the ends of my hair here. :)
shit my face is fucking fat. argh. i sound angry right. but i am really angry.
wahlau i totally buey ta han myself. I SERIOUSLY SHLD GO ON A DIET AND STOP BINGEING (however u spell it). ARGH. I LOOK SO ER XIN.
nvm. other random pics from before...
the "couple" - meifong and vincent. i love vincent cus he has a super good and charming voice. and his eyes are really electrifying. hahaha. im in love. his voice is really power la. and he is really qt charming. hahahaha. okok enough of his charm.
and now, its time for my biggest gift to my beloved blogfans:
PRESENTING TO YOU...
PERFECT CHAR!!!
is she an angel or is she a fairy? i cant decide. pls help.
i tink i know the ans.
shes a goddess.
i shall slp aft blogging a little and also waiting for my photos to finish uploading.
was a schedule-tight day. i jus came home! i reached home half an hr ago and i have bathed alrd. so nice. i love bathing. :)
went shopping and cutting hair at neogeo. my hair was nice last night. but not anymore. i washed everything away le... hai.
rushed to meet wh and mf at amk. i was late for half hr. took cab to justin's and before i cld even warm my seat, gw called and said they were gona watch "staying alive". i decided to skip it cus it was only abt 2hrs to the movie and i hadnt even talked to anyone yet at the gathering. moreover, mf was feeling down. vince and wh were gona acc her to go pub and pool. was also feeling a bit hesitant.
and when i finally made a decision to go with them, my xiao kent kent called and asked me if i wanted to go chomp chomp. was really in a dilemma. but in the end i decided to acc mf go ktv instead. so we left just's hse at 10 and went kbox. sang till 3 and cabbed back to just's hse again and played cards till 5. cabbed again to thomson prata hse and ate prata (obviously). so this ends my day. :)
Thursday, October 05, 2006
feeling kinda tired now. cldnt walk properly on my way home. was slouching and dragging my feet...
i jus ate petite brunch a pkt and a little bit of goodwood park durian mooncake. =D
patrick bought ritz carlton for his gf's mum and his gf bought goodwood park for us. actually i wanted shangrila durian and green tea cus they are super yummy but its sold out. jus now me and xuan went taka and ALL mooncakes from the well-known hotels were alrd snapped up by... yahla. by pple lor.
we were eating at delifrance and looking at poor bengawan's many many stacks of mooncake boxes with unsold mooncakes. the caesar salad with only veg cost 8 bucks. this is stupid. but the fruit tarts aft my salad made up for the stupidity la. nice. haha.
took cab again this morn. why? cus of my stupid mascara. was really pissed off with myself. my face was really black. the taxi uncle didnt even dare to ask me for the destination. so we went arnd in circles. =x
anws. last night went dinnering at banquet with my colleagues. fried kuay teow and prata. then vincent sent me home and this time we really really got lost. hahaha. we almost reached msia lor. i swear. in the end he took expway and went to yishun. was really one big big circle la.
i changed and immediately rushed out for suppering with ham wy and xuan. my fav tau huay plus satay plus ketupat plus carrot cake. gosh. portable diary... im sad. :( u shld know why.
time for bed. nites pple.
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
sigh. im feeling kinda sad now.
where are you? :(
once again, ive reached the stagnant stage of my life, once again. it happens many times a year. its happens many times in my life or maybe, this is my life.
schooling is so fun hor... bloody arsehole. selfish ego stupid idiot. damn.
mum said i "feel" hot and she thinks i have fever. it might be due to the 6 pcs of peanut butter bread i ate today.
i know ur nice to me. but i will nv appreciate pple who are nice to me. rem wat i did to... hai nvm. they are jus memories that we once shared, memories nobody else knew and memories that need to be kept aside so as not to hurt myself...
everything seems to be repeating. this feeling is not good. im feeling tired and sad.
nvm. lets jus talk abt work. work is ok. had a sense of achievement for like 5 secs and poof! the thing jus went away aft i overheard sth some pple said. however, this morn was late. i woke up at 8.50! im supposed to start work at 8.30 everyday. i managed to bathe and then reached at 9.15. not bad le la hor. but this is v v bad. how cld this happen. hai i duno la.
my life is... i duno. i wish it can end soon. quick quick. sounds silly but pls. quick.
Monday, October 02, 2006
didnt really pack my room. only watched tv and ate some calbee crackers. feeling kinda sian now. i took a nap from 12.30pm till 7pm jus now. if philip didnt wake me up to watch my show, i tink i wld still be slping. nice having a bro sometimes. hai so sian. i got nth to do now... :(
ytd's dinner at oriental was good. the food was all so highclass. i wana get married too. so nice. but i wana look as gorgeous as charmaine (lim) first. hai so pretty. her figure is damn good la. wah lau. k anws. went home and fell aslp almost immediately.
mahjong on fri night. fell aslp (i know im always falling aslp) on hansen's sofa while waiting for vincent and wh. they got lost lor. we waited till duno wat time and then played till almost 7. reached home and took a 1hr nap and went office. left aft 3hrs and went town. home again and napped for 1hr plus and off to meet meiling. then its dinner time. didnt feel v shagged but i didnt wana go out with my heels and dress and fat-looking me.
hai. the whole night i felt so fat. i kept eating some oily fried buns. v nice ma. i love bread. the cake was damn nice and lisa's share was mine actually but i cldnt take in anymore. so wasted la!
this morn i asked mum buy dou sha bing again. but she bote the big big version. nice still but too big la. then patrick's gf bote a lot of breakfast for us. haha and needless to say, i do appreciate her effort a lot alot. his gfs all seem v caring and nice... good for him but bad for them. hmm...
Sunday, October 01, 2006
im checking my bank a/c balance online now. this is scary...
i spent 1000 last mth. and this mth... only 8 days have passed... OH MY GOD.
i withdrew 400! this is like... 50bucks per day. shit. i hafta save.
anws im gona pack my room. its v messy. laters.
omg. 4o0.