oh, love's gonna get you down.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

today, i didnt feel like talking to anyone at all. im v glad there was adeline arnd to talk to liz. i walked by myself, with the phone in my hand, as always. there were smses left unreplied but i really had no mood to reply and if im moodless, my replies wld reflect my mood and i shldnt be rude to my friends. in the end, i still messed up a conversation with a friend. i really shld stop and think sometimes before replying. actually i do. but when im not in the EQ mood, i just say whatever i feel and its really all heartfelt words. and i really shld stop thinking so much abt every single statement made by pple. smsing and msning really bring about a lot of miscommunication and i love smsing lor. the night before, a sms made me cry. thinking back, how silly i was. and thinking further back, i wish i didnt say a lot of things i had said and which started this whole shit.

in class, the phone rang. i didnt want to answer. i knew if i did, i wld be thinking abt work again. last wk, i decided not to let work take over my life so i stopped checking for mails. i tried. i think i checked about 5 times? today, i checked only twice. thats v good!

sigh. i really feel that my life is so messed up and i wish there was an eraser which can remove all the stains i made. all the words and all the actions.

ok. this post is so random cus my thoughts are messed up too. nvm. i shld learn to relax. relax pat.

oh yah i wanted to watch dvds over the weekend to destress and er. the dvd cldnt play.

at 12:46 AM

Monday, October 19, 2009

im glad i didnt get zee avi's album. its... alright only. i think joanna wang is better.

Is this the end?
Then why does it feel
We’d only just begun
I thought we were done

I think I’ll hang on
If you still want me
But if you don’t
I guess I’ll move on

And if you need me
Close your eyes and dream
I’ll give you back your key
But will you be happy?
Will you be happy?

Said we’ll leave it alone
But I wont be here long
And when I’m gone
I guess then we’ll know

at 5:01 PM

Sunday, October 18, 2009

ive decided to move on and change to a new playlist!
i always listen to the same few albums/ songs for weeks or even months.
im too lazy to dl new songs & update my mp3 player. im so glad kent burned songs for me. :)
its been really really long since i last met my friends! everyone's so busy huh...

this song made me sad on my way to class this morning.

its been a while since i last posted chinese lyrics.
i used to post lots of chinese lyrics cus... i find them meaningful. i still find them meaningful la and i still can relate to them.

又来到这个港口
没有原因的拘留
我的心乘着斑剥的轻舟
寻找失落的沙洲

随时间的海浪漂流
我用力张开双手
拥抱那么多起起落落
想念的还是你望着我的眼波

我不是一定要你回来
只是当又一个人看海
回头才发现你不在
留下我迂回的徘徊
我不是一定要你回来
只是当又把回忆翻开
除了你之外的空白
还有谁能来教我爱
又回到这个尽头我也想再往前走
只是越看见海阔天空
越遗憾没有你分享我的感动

我不是一定要你回来
只是当又一个人看海
疲惫的身影不是我
不是你想看见的我
我不是一定要你回来
只是当独自走入人海
除了你之外的依赖
还有谁能教我勇敢
除了你之外的空白
还有谁能来教我爱

today is such a hot day! i feel like bathing again. i wanted to go do my nails but i decided to follow shar and her CG to tpy. why did i tag along ah? so strange.

saturday was a super sunny day. i was so thrilled work ended finally, at 730pm. 8 hours of work in the sun is no joke seriously. i dont like to work with wj. i dont know why. i cant stop rolling my eyes each time he opens his mouth. he shld grow up. haha ok la. im biased. hes actually not that bad la. during dinner, xuan smsed to ask me go watch 500 days of summer but i cldnt make it to yishun in time! what a waste. next wk lor. hehe. i love my homie. :) went f21 after dinner but there was nth to buy. hahaha i visited f21 three times the past wk! crazy right.

i went vivo on wed before dinner and i was so pleased i bought sth! but im even more pleased that i didnt buy more than two items cus i was obviously having shopping therapy and buying on impulse. yay! i have better self-control now.

but er. on thurs after work, i went vivo again and bought more things. hahahaha. aiya. once in a while only ma. :) spending money really makes me happier though. it did cheer me up. i didnt need kent.

i was freezing on thurs night even with two blankets on me. 2nd or 3rd time falling sick since i joined anergy. i think. i was rarely sick! i went for work the next day though cus i had to prep for the wkend and anyway, fri's dinner&movie was cancelled. when i got home, i slept from 8pm-2am. i guess i was really quite tired from work & school & other misc activities.

uh. aaron just smsed me abt some random shit. hes mr. super duper random. nvm. you dont wanna hear the details. shar hates him.

tues - ramen ten with junyu dan and liz. it was horrible. NEVER step into any ramen ten pls.

mon - dinner with aaron and rayson. they were mad lor. everyone had a set meal and they still ordered 6 wings and 15 meatballs. i hate meatballs.

sun - cookyn with mervyn and followed by dinner with zy. supposed to have steamboat with LLF & gang but aiya she la. so busy with making money from the tuition kids. hahaha.

sat - no work! damn shiok. so happy i didnt have to work lor. hehe. there were many events on that sat though. its lantern festival! was it? oh it wasnt. anw, there was like the sn moonlight party, the gbs-supper plan, the bbq, the funeral, the revision with mr. prick... but i attended none. i was so tired that i napped twice. i knew my period was coming and it came that night! so clever of you pat.

ok. i gotta reply smses now. i feel so lazy though. and i need to study also. bye.

at 5:21 PM

back to listening to marie digby again.

It's not everday
That I find a person quite like you
Perfect every way
I finally found the nerve to confess that it's you that I want
I don't care if I act a fool
I would damn near beg for you
Put aside, all my pride
So don't keep me hanging here
Cause this girl is falling stupid for you
Stupid for you

The proper thing to do
Is for me to act like a lady and wait
For you to make the first move
But I don't think you're getting the point
That it's you that I want
I don't care if I act a fool
I would damn near beg for you
Put aside, all my pride
So don't keep me waiting here
Cause this girl is falling stupid for you
Oh, oh stupid for you

Why's it always feel like I am
Chasing love when nothing's there
And here I go just making the same mistake

I've fallen stupid for you

at 4:55 PM

Saturday, October 10, 2009

the weather is damn shiok. and youre asking me to go swimming and studying at tampines? huh. im sorry friend. i dont want to. i totally have my own things to do la. what a prick seriously.

i spent the whole night missing... oh! hehe. bitter heart is playing in the background now. i love that song. zee avi's just you and me was on repeat mode the whole of friday. i love it. im unable to dl her other songs though. so sad. maybe i shld get the cd after all. but, i spent 230 on wednesday lor. luckily i didnt visit the fortune-teller. otherwise, there really goes my fortune man.

i missed my class last sunday! i need to watch the videos later to learn the steps. i saw a bit. wah seems hard. scary. headed to nora's house for a hari raya visit and it turned out good aft all. :) even though theres this irritating person in the vicinity and its still sad to realise how distant me and lina have become but nvm. it shldnt matter to me when it doesnt matter to that person. surrogates was after the visit. unexpectedly, i thought it was ok. everyone else didnt like the show. and er. i didnt want to watch lor pls. apparently, the irritating person insisted on watching. the boys then accompanied me to ikea to get my drawers! im so happy! now my shoes are in my room! so neat. everywhere else is messy though hahaha. my salmon stuffed with chives was not nice. so sad. ikea's menu is damn limited actually. they had nth i like. i dont like meatballs also.

wah. mr prick smsed me. ok la. im sorry abt being so quick-tempered. i'll change. well, its another hour on the phone with him again.

i spent my mon & wed with char and we spent a lot of money tgt. sadly, i didnt see anything that i cld fit in. v sad hor. im really obese. to think i wanted to get up early and jog. sigh. but i was too lazy and tired. even though aaron woke me up with his sms at 9am or sth. tsk tsk. its a saturday hello. i slept at 3am!

i finally cut my hair! it cost a bomb. and i finally went crystal jade! i had major craving for xiao long baos and la mian. but in the end, we stepped into the wrong one so we had wanton mee instead. hahaha. funny people was good! i like the soundtrack. its all songs by beatles i think. and i like seth rogen and adam sandler! they are so cute. seth rogen looks kinda funny with his weight loss but yea. i love their friendship. its so swt. oh jonah hill was a retard in it. so sad. but nvm. it was a good good night. btw, me and char heart judd apatow's shows. we shall watch his every show!

for once, my last working day of the week is a friday and we went to the zoo! it was really fun! i didnt look like i enjoyed but i did la. im always like a mother-figure at the back, strolling, watching my kids have fun. i like it. :) though motherly but yea. dinner was with jinhui and zy. i like jh. hes so earnest and nice. hes been my colleague for maybe 1.5years but we nv spoke more than 5 sentences. haha and now that we spoke like 500 sentences ytd, i think we are friends! haha.

the night was kinda disturbing. nvm. anw, pat pat. dont eat when you dont feel hungry. theres a huge difference btwn hungry and greedy even though both have 6 letters. ok lame. bye.

at 11:46 AM

Monday, October 05, 2009

im qt glad i didnt post the entry which i drafted last night. i dont wanna read it again cus i dont wanna be reminded of how mean/ ungrateful i am to people who love me and how rebellious a person i am.

im really happy the week has finally ended cus i was really eating like mad. potato chips were my saviour. chocolates were my saviour. i was feeling so stressed on saturday that i asked teckguan to get chocs for me so that i cld feel a bit better. he bought me 2 packets and im really really thankful. :)

my legs were aching from standing for almost 10hrs at work. and when i got home, i had to say hurtful things to my mum. whatever it is. ive decided not to talk if possible. cus anyway, even if i do, nothing can be changed. in life, sometimes, we gotta shut up and accept cus you can nv get the things you want if others think you dont deserve them.

fri was ichiban with neo. hehe. i love ichiban's crispy lobster salad. thats my only reason to visit ichiban. i was so pleased neo loved it too! after ichiban, we climbed up a flight of 6-storey high stairs to mt sophia. its crazy. we had to take mini breaks in btwn hahahaha. nah. i was kidding. me and neo are how fit pls. when we finally reached the peak, ujin had to tell us the surprise for his gf was changed to loof. we wanted to kill him. we took like 30mins to climb up lor.

when we got to loof, nobody was there. we stood at one corner like idiots plus i was in tshirt and a skirt i think. damn lok kok. i didnt know we were gg to surprise van! it was a last-min thing. sigh. i wanted to pretend to be a cleaner and start cleaning the corner with my hanky but even the cleaner dressed better. what a loser right. me i mean. not the cleaner.

oh well, the night ended well after all cus the bday girl was extremely surprised! hehe. and it was quite worth the wait for neo i guess cus she loved the cake. hahahaha. what a pig.

thurs was beishan's grandma's wake. it was quite weird cus everyone was taking grp photos etc. her uncle was taking pictures non-stop with his dslr and everyone looked normal... you wldnt know it was a funeral if you didnt see the photo and the er. coffin?

wed was van's bday dinner and aston was... i thought it was normal. but i know van loves anything meaty. oh i liked the sides though. can i go eat kenny's mac & cheese soon pls? dessert was quite a spread. we had 5 cakes i think. but secret recipe has like 20 diff kinds of cakes lor. we need a few more special occasions & excuses to finish trying all the diff flavours.

mon & tue were home swt home. home isnt that swt but my bed is. i thk we were supposed to eat the apparently best-in-town ramen on mon. oh no. can we eat that soon?

at 1:24 AM