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pat
height: 170 cm
weight: 300 pounds
pimples: 2481793

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August 2006
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x

by !rock

Thursday, August 30, 2007

it was ok if it was only "secret admirer" and now its "martin yan"?? hahah. so strange la.

anw im feeling super worried. abt work. sth terrible which i did. i dont know. i wished i cld skip work next wk. did i tell u? its sch hols for me! i wanted to go back work but i guess i shld really revise my work. and make sure i understand everything that i was taught the past one mth... and its not like my hols are v long. its only a wk with 3 days of work. er yah.

last night was dinner with perfects. and the last time we had full attendance was during chars bday la. thats feb. the meeting set me thinking on a lot of stuff. which i think... hmm... haha nvm. lets jus do this slowly... k? it takes time.

i wana live in bishan or thomson. its only 30mins away from clementi!

was dozing off during econs. damn slpy. i shall buy swts to keep myself awake next time.

oh yah. i saw one of the chopstick sisters! lee yenling! my sec 1 classmate who looked like chopstick and meepok's sister! hahaha. actually she still looks chopsticky la. she was reading some notes and i was v paiseh to approach her. aft all, i totally ballooned these few yrs. but neo egged me on. hahah egged. anw. i bet she was revising for next year exams or sth. still as studious as ever. sigh. nus mech engineering. nus = smart.

at

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

philip came running back home and...

he: jie!
me: yah?
he: guess what?!
me: ...
he: i got 43...
me: ...... -omg. 43/100? heart attack la.-
he: ... 43 UPON 50 for my science exam leh!
me: oh really?!? yay! philip! are you very happy??
he: yes! thats why im feeling very excited and i want to call mama and papa to tell them!
me: ok! yay! erm. come in and eat your duck rice.

haha he is really happy and he even thanked me. i almost teared.

he: jie. thank you leh. i must really thank you cus you told me to study.
me: er yah... k la. dont say alrd. im gona cry.

i wiped my tears and he went running to the kitchen... haha not cry la. get a spoon for his duck rice. after eating duck rice, he said... "wah first time i get band 1 for my science leh, jie!" hes still jumping arnd now. hope he really understands "what you reap is what you sow".

haha k la. kinda pointless right. another one coming up...

he: jie. whos john travolta?
me: there, that one lor. -points at his picture-
he: then whos this woman? -points at edna turnblad-
me: same person lor.
he: huh?! how can that be? its impossible lor.
me: ...
he: its amazing lor. how can he be this woman ? whats her voice like?
me: same lor...
he: wah i cant believe it... oh but qt similar la. his eyes so small... hers also...
me: ...

ive been in a crazy hairspray mood since sat that i sing "good morning baltimore" even in front of my customers and i skip around my colleagues and i give stupid ans to my family members.

philip: eh whats that ar?
me: i dont know?
me: erm. i think its...
philip: "good morning baltimore" right?
me: OMG! PHILIP! hahaha. so clever! "oh oh oh woke up today..."

and we both start singing tgt. even patricks gf thinks im crazy la. hahaha.

on mon, i was singing it when the EVP (executive vice-president) walked in! woah. if not for my good vocals, i guess he wld have sacked me. hahaha.

btw. Life! gave Ratatouille FIVE STARS lor. so i guess maybe you shld watch la. after all, my perception of humour is different from the norm.

at

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

so happy i can slp till later than 8am tmr! :D

at

Monday, August 27, 2007

i want to eat subway or sakae! pls? charbee and charneos and weninha?

i jus ate din tai fung and i think i will stop eating it for 2 months? haha. pls lor. we ordered super a lot jus now.

yam xiao long bao
normal xiao long bao
chili crabmeat xiao long bao
2 sesame buns
1 braised tofu with meat
1 plate of egg fried rice
1 medium bowl of sour and spicy soup
1 green tea pudding with red beans

there were only me ailing and meixuan lor! a lot of food right. this is crazy.

watched Ratatouille last night and ate a lot of popcorn. i prefer nachos though but i think many like popcorn. im a people-pleaser so pop! popcorn! er. haha. anyways, i thought it was ok only la. its skippable. as in the show. and yah the popcorn too. nachos and cheese rock la.

hairspray is a must though. the whole of ytd and today i was in a hairspray mood. haha i kept promoting the show to EVERYONE i met. and i kept singing...

oh oh oh woke up today...

GOOOD MORNING BALTIMORE.......
everyday is like an open doorrrrrrrr :)

i spent 90 bucks today lor. i dont think i bought much. it was only ntuc. and chips. woah.

at

Sunday, August 26, 2007

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at

my fav la mian from din tai fung!!!


our fav yam xiao long bao! :D


my crazily heavy lect notes.


the bday boy!




our colorful starbucks!


haha our shared and finished mango cheesecake.


the two mei nuu.




potatoes.


the cute duo. (im praising you too, neo. haha.)






the oh-so-pretty duo. hahaha.






caution! we are HOT!










the four of us. :)








mandy moore! hahaha.

at

hi there. fattilicious is here... been qt sad the past few days (including today) but... theres nth i can do. kangs cam spoilt jus now and i told her, its repairable... unlike some things. she jus stared at me, with mouth wide opened. weird huh.

sigh so slpy. and the feeling of the need to shit but unable to is here again... :(

hairspray is really fantastic. go watch ok? the cast is good and every character is so cute la.
p.s. wen! go watch it pls! hope ur ok alrd. we had wanted to visit u but u werent at home. anws. we're going thomson for dinner on wed!

still feeling v full. sigh. dinner was subway and supper was mos. im gona eat subway when i meet xuan the next time. so cheap!

today is tecks bday! happy bday teck! was shopping for his present on thur aft sch. my stupid ibm lecturer gave me at least 300pgs of notes la. was really qt pissed. not with him but with... myself? i had to carry the notes arnd in cityhall, looking for presents and shoes. my stupid feet are stupidly huge. sigh whatever it is. ive bought a pair of overpriced shoes. nvm. like wat gw always says: i have nth but money.

din tai funged with xuan on wed. we ate so much lor. but v satisfying. i love the la mian. lina said crystal jade is nicer. but ytd we went crystal jade for tecks bday celebration and both me and xuan conclude that din tai fung rocks! qt sick of la mian though. ate twice a wk at least lor.

lunch on wed was at ghim moh with neo. i love neo. thats all i wana say. i know this aint mutual but its ok. she will regret not loving me as much as i love her. haha i guess its vice versa la. she secretly loves me more. =p (she hates this smilie. haha.)

at

Sunday, August 19, 2007

i need to go on a diet. during lunch on fri, i ate 3 stir hor fun, an orange, a bowl of cheng teng and tapioca with gula melaka. dinner was a slice of cake. supper was tongshui - floss toast, chicken and chicken burger. !!!!!

sat was laksa and beehoon and kw's bbq cum buffet. !!!!!

today, i went chc for service. freaking early la. it lasted from 10 till abt 3 at expo and i still went town. the crowd in town caused severe headache. so happy that someone gave her seat to me in the train. i slept till bishan and xuan called me. met for sakae which made me really happy. bought 8 pkts of chips! made me happy too. :)

oh yah. lunch was a donut with BK fries and onion rings. when i came home from sakae, i ate my mums dumplings and cookies and a slice of choc cake and 2 otah.

i shld really quit my job and go to sch everyday. i eat damn little when i have sch lor. cant wait for wed!

-

i jus cried. still crying. u know, if only... if only what some pple say is true, abt washing away sins by doing whatever and whatever? which i dont rem la. but i do not believe in telling pple how sad i am all the time bcus, so what if i tell? things are still the same. did anyone solve the prob for me? everyone jus tells me to do this to do that. if it is so easy, i wld have done it a year ago. "stop indulging in your sadness, pat. you think too much, pat. get over it, pat." i know what everyone's gona say. i know. but i jus cant.

are u going to tell me now that i can? jus that i choose not to. cus this is what i told others. i thought i could. but im still like this.

if only repentance cld help to make things better, turn back time, remove regrets or whatever magical or impossible solutions, i would gladly put in 1000% of effort in everything. how abt being a saint?

no. everything is nth but a lie. a big fat lie. even if i become a better or a super duper nice person whom pple worship, things still remain the same.

someone convince me otherwise. if u can, i will go cambodia and vietnam to build houses for the poor. really. if things cld be the same again, im willing to do anything no matter how lazy i may be.

btw. sth which i studied in sociology and i guess i totally applied in the wrong area - juvenile delinquents remain as who they are bcus, the society does not give them a chance. society forces them to remain as who they are.

ok. the crying has stopped. period.

enough of diet and emo stuff... on a happier note, im glad to have sincere friends like teckguan and kangwei. i think they are really sincere. and im v blessed to have a good friend like neo cus she doesnt mind my inner ugly-ness and i guess when sept 23rd really arrives, i might jus... i dont know. i'll be ok, for sure.

if you haven noticed, pat has become a robot. and someday, robot pat will become a battery-less robot. sometimes, i feel so tired of life. every min, u hafta try and excel. every min, u hafta try and be nice. every min, u hafta think abt the next min and the min before.

i worry abt work abt sch abt presents abt friends abt dont know what nonsense and i still procrastinate. so whose fault? mine. the only thing i do not worry abt is whether the sky will fall. cus i wish... but then again, wishes nv come true for me.

since wishes do not come true at all, i shall reveal 2 of my 3 bday wishes every year.
1: for my family to be ... (this definitely must come true so on 2nd thought, i better not reveal it)
2: for me to be happy (this will nv come true unless... erm so yah.)
3: ...

work tmr. i better slp now. if i can. sigh. i promise, this will be the last publicly posted emo entry. gd night!

at

since kw is a super procrastinator, her super belated bday bbq cum buffet was held ytd (sat) evening.

and since im also a procrastinator, i was almost late so i took a cab down. actually, i was worried that kw cldnt manage. but er, i didnt know she ordered buffet also so everything was ok la. except the fire. they took super long to start the fire lor. almost 2hrs i think.

i didnt wear a skirt cus i wanted to help bbq. mei xiang dao, her 40 "good friends" were all qt pro-active (i think the sec sch u were in makes a diff) and they did all the bbq-ing. so ok la. i still smell nice. i think kw is qt a good host. as compared to me. i rem during my buffet, i was busy eating and... eating?

-

woke up at 1pm for lunch (mee goreng + laksa) and napped till 5. now i feel slpy again. feeling slpy is good. slpy is better than sad.

work was ok ytd. but my two little toes got two huge blisters. really huge. wen saw and she almost cried. sigh. i need to get new shoes! i mus go to town tmr aft service. sian la. hafta wake up so early. urgh.

met up with the guys at tongshui on fri. haha :) was super tired so i napped a while first before nice gw came and fetch me at 10.30. without him coordinating and stuff, i think i might jus die lor. really shagged la.

the chicken floss toast was qt nice. yay. next time got new thing to order.

-

my snr exec is v quick to judge. i dont think pple shld be too quick to judge and worse still, being so critical of others. im not a v nice person. im always being materialistic - always talking abt choosing a rich bf, a high-educated bf, a bf with stable job or high salary, buying only clothes with brands, but i dont think im too quick to judge others and i dont think im v critical of others.

yes. im always criticizing pple but i dont ostracize them or stop befriending them ma. oh if i do stop talking to you suddenly, it might be bcus u peed on the toilet seat or u are a liar.

actually, i really always criticize meh? i dont think so leh.

and yes. i thought stracy's bf is a good catch and he has a high salary and is rich and has a car and is nice and all, but its "good judgement" ma.

what im talking abt is, for example, someone says that xxx is going out with zzz, then aaa says "huh what a bitch la." and starts to bitch abt xxx and zzz to bbb. i think thats v bad lor.

worse still, bbb nv even verify or confirm and concludes that xxx is really "weird". like, "why is she doing this?"

sigh. dont listen to one side of the story la. i mean you may listen but dont form impressions or form conclusions jus like that. anw i think friends shldnt even really interfere in what other friends wana do. unless its illegal, immoral, unhealthy or wrong. we shld only give advice.

therefore, i love you meixuan!

at

Thursday, August 16, 2007

my nails are wet.

-

the dating in "secret" is really sweet. but the secret is kinda scary.

ate yummy noodles and yam xiao long bao from din tai fung for lunch and yummy salmon bento set for dinner. my stomach was hungry and my heart was aching. for a long time, that feeling nv came... the tight feeling in my chest...

stars tonight were more than before but they didnt make me happy.
the stars were twinkling, and my eyes were tearing.

i wish i were sick.

-

6hrs of lect tmr and im dreading my first day of work on fri. argh.

at

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

she
is damn hot.

at

Monday, August 13, 2007

stupid char. i jus read from the papers that papaya sisters lip-synched. the originals were by ming zhu sisters.

at

happy 21st kangs!
though you're kinda weird but we still love you. haha. pls burn the photos for us someday k? and the videos! hahah im like talking to air la. she doesnt have internet... :(

me and char went to neo's place at abt 10 to make a "cost-efficient" present for kangs. its like a dream catcher. neo and char made it! i think its qt nice leh. haha photos ltr alright? though i know i've been flooding my entries with fugly photos and you hope i will stop right. NEVER! haha.

aft char painted my nails black, we went to pick wen up from prata hse.

was drizzling. car parked outside "kangs hse" and we got ready the cake and all.

plan A: rang the doorbell. stood outside her "neighbour's" hse with big umbrella, candles lit and present (a fossil watch which we got the other day. i chose it! hahah!). rang the doorbell again. waited again. still no ans. horrible kangs and family!

plan B: called kangs and neo lied that char was at thomson plaza, crying. told kangs to come out of her hse now as neo was on her way alrd. aft 5 mins, super-jiang-yi-qi kangs was still out of sight la. all of us were then squatting alrd, under the big umbrella, outside the "neighbour's" hse.

suddenly. ring ring. kangs called. neo said shes outside kangs place but kangs said she had left the hse and was at the main road alrd?!?! so weird! is there a back door or sth??

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

we were standing and squatting AT THE WRONG HOUSE LA! hahaha! wat the hell right.

plan C: neo told kangs to come find her as she was waiting at the wrong house. wen, char and me quickly hid behind one of the cars. when kangs came, yah... u shld know la. jumped out and shouted happy bday kangs. hahaha. YAY! SUCCESS!!! :)

walked to kangs hse and ate the super hao chi sweet secrets cake. zhen hao chi. :D

but i felt v bad the whole night. char's phone dropped. neo's car almost got scratched. friends sending me home all the time. my dad's unhappiness. and insults from PFs. i shld reflect upon myself. really. dad scolded me twice for going out too much. which i really think is true. but sometimes really cannot help it la. theres always sth impt to attend to ma. and each time im out, i feel so uneasy. like, what will he say again? shit. its getting late. oh no. how?

aft neo's car was checked and confirmed ok, char's phone dropped. then my umbrella "knocked into" the cake. everyone was wet from the rain. kangs eager to show us videos though neo needed to be home early. and neo had to send me home though aft watching the videos, it was alrd v late. like the whole night, i felt v gan cheong and worried and yahla. sigh whatever.

kangs videos were v nice though...

as we go on, we remember,
all the times we spent together.

i wana go exchange also. seems so fun.

anyway, i watched rush hour 3 today and i think its kinda boring. char gets amused so easily la. im sorry. but i dont find a lot of things funny now.

i think 881 is better than rush hour leh. really. mindee ong and yeo yan yan are damn good actresses. and im super proud of them (as if im their friends)!! their getai songs are so good! they sang themselves lor. i love the way they sing and dance on stage. their smiles are so natural real and happy! sigh. i wana excel in sth also. those who understand hokkien pls go watch ok? mus support local shows!

aft 881, we ate tongshui! but i dont crave for peanut butter toast anymore leh. but er. we still ordered la...

fruit with maple syrup toast!


yummy-looking sheng mian but according to gw, he said its not yummy.
er. im not sure la cus i really dont like sheng mian.


strawberry jam & peanut butter toast! v swt. i prefer peanut butter.


i jus youtubed the L word. shane is damn hot. so is her gf carmen. so hot la. but did she cheat on her or leave her? so sad. but im v lazy to load leh. i only watched ep307. hahahah.

daily consumption of green tea is making me slp late and getting scoldings.

dad: who slps till 12 everyday? only lucky and lazy pple like you.

tmr i really hafta stay home le. but tmr is kangs bday leh. as in today la - 13th aug.

HAH! since im not feeling slpy yet, i shall post the pictures. most are in kangs camera though.

both charmaines hard at work.






and er. pat is busy taking pictures. eye makeup is v bad today.






hahaha kangs is super cute! look at that photo!


crazy char cutting her hair.


the completed dream catcher!






us with the "cost-efficient" present for kangs. :)


hahahaa! can you see neo's pimple cream? so cute la.


v nice right!




anyway, dont know why our hands kept shaking the whole night. haha. strange.

me.


neo.


neo again.


can stop shaking or not neo?!


finally...


good night!

at